I remember sitting on our front porch swing trying to take a few cleansing breaths before heading back inside to console our colicky first born! We had gone to the doctor numerous times trying to figure out why he would not stop crying and the response was always -colic with an assurance that in 3 months it would stop. My husband and I would sleep in shifts at night while the other would walk a path through our living room trying to console our baby. We were surviving.
I tried to act like I had it all together, but on the inside I was struggling. I was so worried that the doctor had lied and this was what parenthood would always be like! I was also too prideful to ask for help, I didn’t want to look weak. So I limped my way through that season of my life.
I can look back on those days and laugh now, but let me tell ya, I know what it’s like to just survive.
If you don’t mind, I would like to share with you some nuggets of truth to help you through those seasons of just surviving- and I’m not just talking about parenting seasons. Some of us are just surviving in our jobs, finances or marriages.
The first thing I believe that is so important of us to remember is, it-is-just-a-season. Some seasons last longer than others, but they do have ends.
Secondly, don’t be prideful. If you need help -then get help. Go talk to a counselor or at life coach, someone who can help guide you through this season. I guarantee there are people out there who have been in your shoes and are more than willing to help you.
Thirdly, take care of yourself. When I would go sit on our porch swing I was taking care of myself. So often we neglect taking care of ourselves because we are so focused on taking care of everyone else until we become a shell of a person. When you are on an airplane and the stewardess is going through her directions about if the plane loses cabin pressure, they always say when the oxygen mask drop to, “first put the mask on yourself before assisting the person next to you.” Why? Because you can’t help those around you unless you take care of yourself. Go do something that is life giving to you, something the energizes you- that is your self care.
Lastly, I have learned to pray and ask God to give me His perspective. When I position myself to let Him change how I view my situation I am always comforted and filled with hope. It is like He gives me the spiritual Visine my heart needs.
The truth is, I could have handled the first few months of motherhood a lot better if I would have not been so hardheaded and prideful. I had numerous friends call me and ask me if they could come and help me and each time I would say, “No, I’m fine!”
I have realized that relief comes quicker when you reach out to those who can help you! At that point you being to thrive in those seasons of survival.
“A friend loves at all times, and a bother is born for adversity.” Proverbs 17:17
Until next time my friends, be blessed!
P.S. If you missed last weeks post The Beginning, Middle and the End be sure to check it out. I wrote about that during the seasons of our lives we often focus too much on the beginnings and ends and tend to lose sight of how precious the middle part is.